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- Geej se lèllike voel hod!
- If I ever get to go to the moon, I'll probably just stand on the moon and go´ Hmmm, yeah. fair enough. gotta go home now ~ Noel Gallagher
- Doa hemme ze geen neus op gezet mer nen elleboog... Hy war just te laat vur een neus aan te schaffen met ziene 50cc
- Ik kan grotverdoeme mijn onzichtbare hoorapparaten niet meer terugvinden
- Roept u maar stop!
- ik heb wel een hoog iq maar ik kan dat niet beweizen
- Wedstrijd in vierde provinciale overschaduwt door racistische uitspraak. OverschaduwT, HBVL? Serieus???
- Ons Sarah heeft ´n nieuw lief. Tellefonnééére da die doe!
- de piloot zit aan de grond
- Hehe, random kwootjes. Waar hàlen ze het!
- Huge delivery of Champagne arrives at Tory conference as Boris Johnson's pals discuss poverty
- een spleetmeter, een schaamdoos, een peNISkoker, een gortemeijer, een beflapje, een anuspieper
- ik zou je het liefste in je doosje binnendoen
- Today, at work, as I stood in front of the urinal, I noticed someone had wiped several large, greenish boogers on the wall, one of which still had a nose hair in it. I salute you cleaning staff, I never realized how much shit you had to put up with
- Echt belangrijke mensen, zijn mensen voor wie belangrijk zijn, niet belangrijk is :-)
- Verknoei je tijd op een nuttige manier!
Exam answers
Brigitte, 2004-03-27
These are allegedly ACTUAL answers from recent State exams in England and Wales....amazingly not Ireland!
- English
Define the word “monotony.”
Monotony is being married to the same person all your life.
Use the word “judicious” in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.
What does the word “benign” mean?
Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
What is the correct use of a semi-colon?
Only to be used as a last resort, a semi-colon is a partial removal of the intestines.
- Technology
What is a turbine?
Something an Arab wears on his head.
- -History
What is the highest award for valour in war in Britain?
Nelson´s column.
-Religious Instruction
Who did not welcome the return of the prodigal son?
The fatted calf.
What is a Hindu?
It lays eggs.
Name some famous pilgrimages.
Muslims used to go to Gamages but now it is closed. Christians still go on pilgrimage to Lord°s.
- Geography
Name the four seasons.
Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
What is the equator?
A menagerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.
Name a greenhouse gas. What could be done to decrease global warming?
Cows make large amounts of methane when they fart. This could be reduced by fitting them with catalytic converters.
Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
How is dew formed?
The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
What is a planet?
A body of earth surrounded by sky.
What causes the tides in the oceans?
The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum.
I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
What is a fossil?
A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.
- Biology
What happens to your body as you age?
When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
Premature death.
~ Bekeken: 11 × | TOP | THUIS | TERUG
These are allegedly ACTUAL answers from recent State exams in England and Wales....amazingly not Ireland!
- English
Define the word “monotony.”
Monotony is being married to the same person all your life.
Use the word “judicious” in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.
What does the word “benign” mean?
Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
What is the correct use of a semi-colon?
Only to be used as a last resort, a semi-colon is a partial removal of the intestines.
- Technology
What is a turbine?
Something an Arab wears on his head.
- -History
What is the highest award for valour in war in Britain?
Nelson´s column.
-Religious Instruction
Who did not welcome the return of the prodigal son?
The fatted calf.
What is a Hindu?
It lays eggs.
Name some famous pilgrimages.
Muslims used to go to Gamages but now it is closed. Christians still go on pilgrimage to Lord°s.
- Geography
Name the four seasons.
Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
What is the equator?
A menagerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.
Name a greenhouse gas. What could be done to decrease global warming?
Cows make large amounts of methane when they fart. This could be reduced by fitting them with catalytic converters.
Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
How is dew formed?
The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
What is a planet?
A body of earth surrounded by sky.
What causes the tides in the oceans?
The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum.
I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
What is a fossil?
A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.
- Biology
What happens to your body as you age?
When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
Premature death.
~ Bekeken: 11 × | TOP | THUIS | TERUG
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